Chapter 13

Du Hongting wants to take me to meet his aunt.

I refuse.

Afraid of awkwardness.

Du Hongting says, “Do you think it’s awkward to meet my aunt, or is it more awkward for me to carry you back home?”

I choose to meet his aunt.

On the way, I carefully consider my words: “When you meet your aunt later, don’t introduce us randomly. Just say you’re my… my…”

Du Hongting walks ahead of me, looking at his phone.

Suddenly, he stops, “How do you pronounce these two characters?”

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R zlyd kd.

Jzwdvzu, R alye vbl vos ckt nbyaynvlap oakvvld sd bkp rbsdl’p qwzz pnalld: “Gewzvlala.”

Pw Tsdtvkdt nbwnjzlp.

Yl: “…”

Ubkzekpb!

R’x ps lxcyaaypple vbyv xu qynl kp yzz ale.

R tlv ydtau, “Ebs vbl blzz kp byhkdt yd yqqyka okvb usw!”

Fyukdt vblal’p ds qllzkdt kp elnlkhkdt, cwv R yzoyup qllz zkjl vblal’p y ckv sq lmnkvlxldv xkppkdt.

After all, I’m a dreamy girl, and your figure disappoints me a bit, um, disillusioned.

Do I have to engage in this affair under the threat of his lust?

I can’t do it…

As I raise my head, I see the wind and clouds surging, the weather changing, and Du Hongting’s expression is gloomy, as if he’s going to kill someone.

As usual, I stutter, “You, you, you are forcing good people to turn to prostitution…”

Du Hongting finds it a bit funny, “Others are eager to have an affair with me, and you are not willing! You actually look down on it.”

I blurt out, “Nonsense! I saw you last time taking two blonde girls to check into the Grand Hyatt Hotel!”

It’s over.

Why is Du Hongting staring at me like that?

And he doesn’t speak for a long time.

Is he going to kill me to silence me?

Oh my god!

He suddenly raises his arm!

Then reaches over—

Smiling, he messes up my hair on top of my head.

Du Hongting: “Holding a grudge for so long, only now coming to settle old scores. Are you suffocating?”

Isn’t it called settling old scores when lovers quarrel? What’s the relationship between you and me? Why do I have the qualifications to question you about this kind of thing for no reason…

Du Hongting says he’ll take me to the hotel to check the surveillance.

No, please don’t!

3P and flying together videos are too stimulating; I’m afraid I won’t be able to handle it if I watch them!

Du Hongting: “They are classmates from the German University Exchange Group, here at our school for exchange activities. I know German, so I helped arrange accommodation in a better hotel. If you don’t believe me, you can check the surveillance. There are a total of fifteen female classmates. Are you sure I can handle so many at once?”

Me: “…”

Du Hongting advises me, “Don’t have such a vivid imagination.”

I’m not pleased: “Are you trying to poach someone else’s girl?”

Afraid he might not remember, I mentioned the keyword “condom.”

Du Hongting’s face looks unpleasant: “Buying doesn’t mean I used it!”

“Besides—” Du Hongting suddenly leaned over, whispered, “His size, I used it, too small.”

Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah!

Enough!

I’m still young, my mind is still pure; please don’t casually make remarks!

Finally, I returned home after being severely tortured, following the fat guy.

Du Hongting, as if to confirm something, solemnly introduced me to his aunt: “Meng Qiqi, my girlfriend.”

Auntie shook her head and sighed, “My little nephew is really… bringing this girlfriend today, introducing another girlfriend tomorrow. I really can’t keep up!”

Me: “…”

Du Hongting: Glaring angrily.

Auntie laughed like silver bells, “Just kidding, just kidding. Look how much Du Hongting cares about you, puffed up like a blowfish.”

Me: “…”

Du Hongting was really annoyed, “Uncle’s phone number hasn’t changed, right? I’ll call him and have him take this troublemaker away.”

The beauty’s expression changed rapidly, immediately putting away her smiling face and adopting a stern expression, “Are you driving me away?”

If it were me, I might have tried to ease the awkward situation by saying, “No, not at all.”

But Du Hongting, with a single word, said, “Yes.”

And then, Auntie left.

What on earth?

I’ve never seen an aunt who doesn’t look like an aunt, and a nephew who doesn’t look like a nephew.

Du Hongting silently tidied up the room.

Snacks and packaging were scattered everywhere on the coffee table, slippers and towels were in disarray in the bathroom, and clothes on the bed were rolled into a mess…

All the handiwork of Auntie.

Du Hongting said, “My mom and my aunt, the two sisters are both like this.”

Me: “…”

Du Hongting continued, “Spoiled by men.”

Me: “Oh.”

I felt a bit sorry for Du Hongting, his dad, and his grandpa, as well as Uncle.

Before long, Uncle called to ask about Auntie’s whereabouts.

Du Hongting said, “She ran away.”

Uncle was so angry that he scolded Du Hongting, “Why didn’t you keep her, blockhead!”

Du Hongting retorted, “Stockholm syndrome patient, seeking abuse!”

Uncle sighed and then said, “Your aunt just had an abortion and can’t wander around. She says it’s my fault for not quitting smoking and drinking during the pregnancy preparation period.”

Du Hongting asked, “What happened?”

Uncle replied, “Failed to protect the fetus. She said it was my fault for not quitting smoking and drinking during the pregnancy preparation period.”

Du Hongting said, “It’s not necessarily.”

Uncle admitted, “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have argued back and said the same things to you.”

Du Hongting exclaimed, “Wife slave!”

Uncle said, “If you see her again, don’t mention this matter, just take care of her. Whatever you want, your uncle will buy it for you.”

Du Hongting joked, “I want a Lamborghini.”

Uncle said, “Get lost.”

After hanging up the phone, Du Hongting continued to tidy up and even threw away all the Marlboros and beer in the house with a garbage bag.

I asked, “You smoke?”

Du Hongting replied, “Occasionally.”

I questioned, “Then why throw them away?”

Du Hongting said, “So you won’t suffer from this in the future.”

Me: !!!

Big brother, we haven’t even started, are you thinking too much!

Hurry up and play some games to relieve stress.

Just as we were getting into the game, the guest next door suddenly poked his head in, “Nephew’s wife, does your man know you’re playing games all night and not coming home?”

Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah! I was so scared that I stood up abruptly, “Auntie! I’m coming home now!”

The entire internet cafe echoed with the aftermath.

Auntie and I returned to the dorm together. Fortunately, a roommate often stayed at her boyfriend’s place, so there was an empty bed. I tidied up a bit, but when I turned around, Auntie was already sleeping on my bed.

Seizing someone else’s nest seemed to be a traditional virtue in Du Hongting’s family.

When Auntie woke up, I served her a bowl of red date and sugar egg soup, made by my roommate and kitchen expert, Liu Lijuan.

Auntie, probably starving, finished it all in one go and then asked, “You already know, don’t you?”

It’s over.

Du Hongting had mentioned not to bring up that matter again.

Luckily, I was quick-witted, “Menstrual period, need some replenishment.”

While muttering, Auntie stared at the rice cooker, “Add some more.”

She stayed for a whole week.

Auntie finally calmed down and allowed Uncle to pick her up and return to their palace.

Before parting, Auntie warned me, “Be careful with Du Hongting. Our family has a terrifying genetic disease…”

My heart tightened, feeling sorry for the fat guy. Nervously, I asked, “What disease?”

Auntie replied, “Princess syndrome.”

Me: “…”

Right.

Auntie, aren’t you planning to settle the bill before leaving?

Let’s not worry about other things, but who’s going to pay for the dozens of local hens?

On the day Uncle came to pick her up, he gave me an Alienware laptop.

In an instant, I felt that Auntie’s husband was tall, mighty, and handsome, with an unparalleled charm throughout the universe!

Auntie told me not to stay overnight at internet cafes anymore; this laptop had a high configuration for playing games.

Auntie.

What can I say about you?

You’re truly the least like an aunt that I’ve ever seen…