1.4

I remember that day was May 27, 2016. Wei Min had to leave early for a business trip and I also happened to be going to a place near that city for my business trip, so I conveniently went to the airport with him.

From where we lived to the airport, there were three roads. There was a cave in on the road we normally take, so Wei Min’s driver took a longer detour from the outer ring road.

On the road, I received a call from the station saying that my business trip had been canceled. I returned my ticket and wanted to send Wei Min to the airport before having the driver send me to the station.

Wei Min and I sat in the backseat, chatting: “How long is your trip this time?”

“Half a month.” Wei Min exhorted: “You’re not allowed to order takeout, I will have the housekeeper watch you.”

“I know I know, I won’t order it, I won’t.” I moved right in front of him: “When I’m off on the weekend, I’ll fly over to see you.”

Wei Min chuckled: “I don’t believe you.”

“I will really go this time!” I raised my hand to swear by it, but I saw his expression suddenly change. Immediately after, my vision turned black, I could only hear the incredibly loud sound of a collision, and waves of terrible stabbing pain swept through my body.

The following parts of the text will be scrambled to prevent theft from aggregators and unauthorized epub making. Please support our translators by reading on secondlifetranslations (dot) com. If you are currently on the site and and you are seeing this, please clear your cache.

R blyae Elk Ykd nyzzkdt xu dyxl cu xu lya. R oydvle vs ydpola bkx, cwv R alyzzu bye ds pvaldtvb. R sdzu jdlo vbyv R pllxle vs cl pkdjkdt. Gde vbld, R pydj kdvs nsxrzlvl eyajdlpp.

Ebld R yosjl, R bye clnsxl vbl oyu R yx dso, zkhkdt cu Elk Ykd’p pkel yp y prkakv. R nyd blya, R nyd pll, cwv R nyddsv vswnb.

Xvbla rlsrzl esd’v jdso sq xu lmkpvldnl lkvbla.

R esd’v jdso kq kv oyp vbl nyalzlppdlpp sq vbl osajlap sq vbl wdelaosaze vbyv shlazssjle xl ps vbyv R alxykdle kd vbkp osaze, cwv R oyp hlau tzye R nswze pvyu cu Elk Ykd’p pkel.

R jdlo R oyp yzalyeu elye.

Mbl plnsde eyu yqvla R ekle, xu ryaldvp awpble vs Fbydtbyk vs vyjl nyal sq xu qwdlayz yaaydtlxldvp. Elk Ykd oyp kd y nsxy vbl obszl vkxl. Yu cseu nswzed’v cl jlrv qsa vss zsdt yde vblu elnkele vs byhl xl nalxyvle kd Elk Ykd’p pvlye. Yu ypblp olal caswtbv cynj yde rzynle kd xu yde Elk Ykd’p bsxl.

Elk Ykd oyp kd y nsxy qsa byzq y ulya. R pvyule clpkel bkx qsa vbkp byzq y ulya.

Tl nswzed’v ynnlrv xu elyvb. Kwpv yp kd vbl rypv, bl pbwv bkxplzq wr kd swa assx, lmnlrv vblal oyp ds sdl swvpkel vs jllr bkx nsxrydu vbkp vkxl.

He hugged my ashes as he laid on the bed, not eating nor drinking. My mom stopped outside the door many times, but was unable to make him come out.

In the end, it was my dad who called someone to pry open the door. He was also in pain, he lost his daughter in his middle age. No one can accept a blow like this, but aside from being a father, he was also a man, a husband. He had his responsibilities.

He opened the curtains in the bedroom. Sunlight spilled in. I thought I would be afraid of the light, but it wasn’t the case. I was still standing there.

Watching my dad take my ashes from Wei Min’s arms.

Wei Min finally reacted, but because he hadn’t eaten for too long, he wasn’t about to successfully take me back. He laid on the bed lifelessly: “Dad, I’m begging you, give her back to me…”

Although I was a spirit, I could still shed tears. I wanted to rush over and hug Wei Min, but I couldn’t do it.

Dad stood beside the bed, his words cutting: “Wei Min, you pull yourself together for me! When you begged me and your mom to come to Shanghai to watch you propose, what did you say to use? You said you would take good care of Xiao Ci¹小辞: Little Ci, refers to female lead/narrator, but have you done that?!”

Wei Min choked with sobs: “I did wrong, I didn’t take good care of her, it was me… it’s all my fault…”

I know my dad was doing this for Wei Min’s good. I saw mom’s figure standing at the door wiping her tears, but I was powerless.

Dad told Wei Min that if he wanted to get my ashes back, he had to pull himself together. They lost their daughter, there had to be someone to care for them in their old age and send them off.

It was probably the words ‘caring for them in old age and sending them off’ that made Wei Min finally realize that my parents had long since become his parents too.

He also had his responsibilities.

I watched him leave the bedroom. I thought he had walked out of the shadow of my death, but he had not. He completely closed himself off.

Even though he was still living, he had become reticent and asocial. He lived in agony.

Wei Min buried me in the cemetery in our hometown. Beside me was grandma and his mom. His dad was down some steps in another row, separate from us.

He shifted part of his business here.

On my birthday and death anniversary every year, he would sit here for a very long time. Sometimes talking to me, sometimes talking to grandma and mom. Only during New Year’s would he go visit his father.

But his father’s gravestone was not far from ours. I think he can probably hear what Wei Min said.

I accompanied him year after year. Suddenly, one day, I discovered that Wei Min hadn’t aged very much. He still looked the way he did in my memories.

I couldn’t help sighing, the saying that men remain in their prime into their 40’s²[4] 男人四十一枝花: lit. men have 41 flowers is so true.

Until this year, I had already died for a whole twenty years, and on Valentine’s day, Wei Min suddenly cleaned himself up and went out dressed very formally.

I don’t usually see him going out very much and I didn’t follow him today. I only knew when I heard when he called my parents after he came home in the evening that he had been seeing someone steadily since six months ago. The other person’s parents hoped that the two of them can get married at the end of the year.

I started to think back on when he had a girlfriend, but no matter how much I thought, I couldn’t recall it. I think it was probably because I didn’t have enough energy as a spirit that I was displaying a symptom of memory degradation.

My parents seem to be pretty happy hearing about the matter of Wei Min’s marriage. I was also happy for him. In so many years, I watched him live alone. Many times, I had hoped that he could open his heart to accept someone new.

The first half of his life had already been so difficult, I don’t want him to spend latter half of his life just as painfully.

Wei Min’s wedding day was decided very soon. He began to frequently leave early and return late, sometimes even spending the night outside.

Aside from gladness, I also felt a tiny bit sad. After all, he was someone I loved. Now, he was really going to belong solely to someone else. But it was just that tiny bit.

I already thought it through. After Wei Min gets married, I will move over to my parents’, so I can accompany them as long as I can.

Very soon, the wedding day was almost here.

The day before the wedding, Wei Min told my parents that he wanted to go see me. All the times Wei Min came to my grave in these years, I followed along. I was afraid he would do something foolish. Even though I wouldn’t be able to do anything even if he really did do something, I also wanted to hear what he wanted to say to me.

Today, I also wanted to hear what Wei Min was going to say to me.

I followed him as he got out of the car, behind him, take the stairs, go down the steps, pass a row of cypress trees, before arriving at the place I was buried.

Wei Min had just knelt down, about to burn paper offerings, when his phone rang. He walked to the side to take the call.

I took a step forward. Seeing the inscription and photo on the gravestone, I completely froze on the spot.

The fierce summer sun shone straight down and the sunlight stung the eyes. I moved forward, even closer, reaching out to touch the photo on the gravestone.

To my utter astonishment, I could actually touch things.

I looked downward from the photo, brushing the words one by one as I softly read: “Grave…of…late…husband…Wei…Min…”

“Grave of late husband Wei Min…”

“Grave of late husband Wei Min…”

I touched them over and over again and read them over and over again. Until I saw the tag I wore on my wrist. The tag was made of a thin sheet of metal and on it was a line of words.

“My name is Wen Ci, I am a patient with Alzheimer’s disease. If you see me on the side of the road, please call my son Wei Xun. His phone number is: 114xxxxxxxx/0987-xxxx-xxx. Thank you.”

My name is Wen Ci.

I repeated these five words. Tears fell on the metal tag. Those memories related to Wei Min flooded into my mind.

The piercing pain that came from deep in my head made me feel as if I had returned to the car accident that day.

Wei Min’s blood dripped on my face. I wanted to raise my head to look at him, but I couldn’t lift it. I heard his low voice by my ear. He was calling me—

“Baobei.”

He was saying to me—

“Live…live on well, I will always…love you.”

My tears welled up in an instant.

In those short ten plus minutes in the car, I could feel Wei Min leaving. I wanted to make him stay, I didn’t want him to leave, but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t even respond.

I tried my hardest to speak, but I could only produce a very light whimper.

Wei Min.

I don’t want it.

I don’t want you to leave me.

Our tears and blood mixed together. This was the closest we will be for the last time in our lives.

I lost Wei Min forever.

I could never refuse Wei Min either.

I looked at the photo embedded on the gravestone. When Wei Min was cremated, I was still laying in the hospital in a coma. Mom used the photo from mine and Wei Min’s marriage certificate.

His hair was not long nor short, he was wearing a simple and clean white shirt, his face handsome, looking at me tenderly as always.

As if he had never left.

Looking at him, I could no longer bear it and finally cried.

It turns out.

I was the one that survived all along.

I cried so much my whole body hurt.

I fell to the ground, knocking over the bottle of wine that Wei Xun brought. The sound of collision between the glass bottle and the ground drew Wei Xun’s attention.

He turned around and anxiously ran to me: “Mom!”

Through the haze of tears, I saw his face that looked exactly like Wei Min’s. It was like I had returned to that summer when I was seventeen.

Under the white clouds and blue sky, the figure of seventeen year old Wei Min running towards me.

(End)

—

The author has something to say:

Loving only one person for a lifetime is very hard, [being able to] spending the rest of your life with the one you love is also very hard.

I hope you can love forever, and are forever loved.

---

[1] 小辞: Little Ci, refers to female lead/narrator

[2] 男人四十一枝花: lit. men have 41 flowers