Moreover, after Gong Ze Yun’s death, Ji Nan Feng did many other things. Things that Gong Ze Yun only perceived in the past few days.
After Mo Li Xin passed away, for the bigger part of the year, Ji Nan Feng looked like he lost his soul. Later on, it seemed like he figured things out and pulled himself together. He started investigating a lot of things. Such as his father and mother-in-law’s deaths, and the uncertainties related to Mo Li Xin’s affairs. This was also the only time that Ji Nan Feng was sober. Otherwise, he would numb himself with alcohol. As long as it was not work-related, rain or shine, Ji Nan Feng would spend his time accompanying Mo Li Xin’s grave.
It was about five years later, through the suffering of all his illness and pain, he passed away before he managed to complete his investigations. And this was the scene that Gong Ze Yun would never forget for the rest of his life.
Blood covered the soil, as though the torture Ji Nan Feng put himself through was not enough, he used the cruelest way and end his own life.
It was also at this time that Gong Ze Yun realized that his gentle and elegant third brother was actually such a perverted person. He might be cruel to others, but towards himself, he was more ruthless.
If Gong Ze Yun was ten points certain to break them up and bring Mo Li Xin to his side when he just rebirth. Now, he was only five points certain.
For the following three consecutive days, Ji Nan Feng went crazy trying to find her, yet not a single piece of news was heard. It was also within those three days, Lu Xing Yan managed to arrest more than half of the syndicate group. From that group, he amassed much evidence and some of the arrested were even highly wanted criminals from several countries.
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Ys Nk Dkd pvyale swv vbl okdeso. Tlyakdt xshlxldv, bla lulp qzknjlale yp xydu xlxsau qaytxldvp qzypble clqsal bla.
In the middle of the night, on her way home after delivering soup to Ji Nan Feng she encountered a thug. It was him who appeared and saved her.
On the way to get an abortion, she shed many tears. It was him who handed a tissue to her.
When she was in the ward, waiting for the operation, it was him who silently accompanied her when she was unconscious.
When she wanted to donate her own liver to Ji Nan Feng regardless of her own wellbeing, it was him who was the first to strongly object.
It was now that she knew. She was not the only silly person suffering from unrequited love in this world. It turned out that she also broke another person’s heart.
He also loved her, just like she loved Ji Nan Feng; their love was so obscured and humble.
But so what? If you did not like, you would not like. She finally understood that love cannot be forced, even if one gave it their all.
That’s right, she remembered. She recalled all the bits and pieces of her last life.
And it also included knowledge and scenes of other things she did not experience herself in her previous life.
For example, the one that sent that ruthless message, asking her to go to the hospital for an abortion herself, was Duan An Ran. Ji Nan Feng and Duan An Ran also quarreled over this. Duan An Ran wanted Mo Li Xin to abort the baby, but Ji Nan Feng was strongly against the idea. The whole incident was subsequently made known to Mo Li Xin.
He had said, “it doesn’t matter who fathered the child. She’s currently my wife. So, her child is my child.”
In another event where she could not say that he was heartless; was that he never knew that she had coronary heart disease.
Additionally, for his liver transplant operation, he originally rejected when he knew she was initially his donor. He never got to know that Duan An Ran schemed to have her donate her liver in the end.
Furthermore… she never knew that what kept them apart was not simply just the romantic feelings between the two, but familial issues.
In the past, she thought that her mother did something wrong, but it never crossed her mind that her mother seduced his father. Although her mother finally managed to let go and stop pestering his father, it did not change the fact that her mother killed his father.
But of course, before things were thoroughly investigated in the future, this was what she had assumed…
Even then, he and his family did not blame her for it.
For another instance, she knew that they were all reborn.
The feelings she had towards Gong Ze Yun were guilt and not affection.
The feelings she had towards Ji Nan Feng were extremely complicated. She could not extricate herself from her love. It was to the extent that she paid the price with her life.
It seems that some things… turned out to be more important than life itself.
Thinking back again, she suddenly understood. Regarding the video clip she saw in the car when she was kidnapped, things might not be as simple as she originally thought. Sometimes, hearing and seeing it for oneself might not necessarily be the truth either.
But currently, her thoughts were jumbled and her heart was scared, she did not dare face Ji Nan Feng.
“You… most probably knew too… Tell me… what should I do? I realised that I loved too deeply that it was carved into my bones and engraved into my heart…”
The woman uttered that sentence without turning around. Her empty gaze staring out of the window.
But Gong Ze Yun heard it loud and clear, and he understood thoroughly, she… was also reborn.
For a moment, he was at a loss for what to say. There were so many things he wanted to ask, wanted to say. But embarrassingly, he could not even voice a single word out.
Mo Li Xin continued, “you might not know, but he’s also reborn.”
Her tone was desolated. She did not know if his kindness towards her in this life was out of sincerity or guilt. It was most likely guilt, but even so, she should be happy. At least he finally looked at her. Yet, this left her feeling uncomfortable.
She knew after the experience of their previous lives, Ji Nan Feng could be with anyone with the exception of Duan An Ran. It was impossible between them now, yet, this knowledge did not fill her with joy.
“How… how did you tell?” Gong Ze Yun asked. He regretted the moment the words left his mouth. How could she not realise when she interacted and stayed by his side every day?
“Then, what do you plan to do next?” Gong Ze Yun asked.
Mo Li Xin did not answer, seemingly lost in thought.
Gong Ze Yun did not pester her for an answer either. He just watched her quietly from the side.
This was probably what it meant when people said ‘one glance and it’s for ten thousand years’1 It’s a ‘phrase’ to describe love, it has a similar meaning to ‘love at first sight’. S.H.E. also had a song with this title <一眼萬年>. Give it a listen, it’s not bad =3; the first time he saw her, he knew he could never forget her.
The first time he met her, she was still single. He thought that when he became good enough, he would return and confidently chase after her. But who knew that when he came back, he was greeted with the news of her marriage.
At that moment, he knew that it was no longer possible between them.
Yet, he still could not let her go. He found himself paying attention to everything about her, observing and protecting her from a place where she could not see him.
It was a pity that in the end, they were not meant to be.
“Don’t tell him… of my whereabouts.”
“Alright,” he could not ask for more.
“But… please, find a way to let him know that I’m no longer in danger. That I’m safe…”
Gong Ze Yun was stumped, his fists clenched and released as he laughed indifferently at his fate. Just based on this sentence, he knew he had lost again in this life…
Not long later, Ji Nan Feng received a text. Finally knowing that she was fine.
Staring at the text for a long time. Seeing no reaction, Gan Yun Ting grabbed the phone.
“What does Third Sister-in-law mean? Doesn’t she know that you’re worried about her?” His tone was not one of blame, he was just stating the facts.
Lu Xing Yan also looked at the message frowning, “did you two have some misunderstanding?”
Ji Nan Feng did not reply. The photo that was attached to the text kept floating to the front of his consciousness.
She was sitting by the window, holding a sketchpad and pencil as she concentrated on her drawing. She was drawing a wedding dress, one that should not have existed in this lifetime.
It was the very same wedding dress he saw in her diary in their previous life. He still remembered the accompanying words under the sketched dress…
‘If there is another lifetime, I hope to wear the wedding dress of my dream as I walk down the aisle. And this dress… is the wedding dress of my dreams.’
It turned out that she already knew, so… could she forgive him? Who was with her now?
When that came to mind, he took his phone and left immediately.
Standing behind, Lu Xing Yan and Gan Yun Ting blinked and the person before them had already disappeared.
The climate in City B was always extremely volatile. Yesterday, the weather was scorching as the sun beat down. Yet, today, it was raining cats and dogs, accompanied by thunder and lightning. The temperature also dropped by ten degrees.
The woman stood on the roof terrace holding an umbrella as she overlooked the city landscape. The rain finally stopped, and the whole city seemed to be washed clean. The air was as fresh as before with the whiff of earthiness hanging. Unknown to others what was going through her mind at that moment, but she had stood there motionlessly for more than an hour already.
When Gong Ze Yun came back, he saw a forlorn and lonely figure.
Walking over, he placed the blanket he brought out on her shoulders, glancing at the already dried umbrella unconsciously, “it’s chilly, don’t catch a cold.”
“Do you think… it will rain again later?” she asked.
“No, the clouds have dispersed. You should put the umbrella away. Besides, if it rains, there will be lightning. It’s not safe for you to be holding an umbrella then.”
Mo Li Xin seemed to think of something. She smiled and folded the umbrella. “God didn’t accept me… Even King Yama2 King Yama is the King of Hell. already chased me out once.”
“Then, do you want to go back there again?” Gong Ze Yun stood by her side, looking into the distance.
It took a long time before he heard her denial, as she meekly turned to go back inside.
“You’re pregnant. Slightly more than a month,” he suddenly informed her.
Mo Li Xin’s calm and undisturbed expression finally showed signs of cracking.
“It’s about time it happened too…” She caressed her belly.
The corners of her lips lifted into a smile, but it disappeared as quickly as it came.
In the following days, Mo Li Xin seemed to act normally. She would eat when she should, drink when she should, and go out for walks as if nothing was wrong. The only exception was she did not speak much.
It was on the tenth day after her kidnapping and disappearance, did the person she wanted to see but did not dare to meet appear in front of her.
While she was alone, she reflected on a lot of things. She pondered on what her next step should be, but in the end, she could not come to a definitive answer. Or maybe, she just was not resolute enough to make her choice.
She wanted to leave him, but at the same time, she could not bear to do so. She did not know why, in her previous life, her will to leave him did not weaken the slightest even up to the moment she died. But in this life, she seemed to have wavered.
It’s most probably when one once possessed something and suddenly loses it, it would cause certain feelings of grief.
Sometimes rebirth novels fill me with a sense of melancholy… In real life, we don’t have the luxury of a reset button…