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  • Just Want to Be His Lover

    Chapter 34.4

    Shen Jue pulled down the wet collar on his left shoulder, revealing a poppy-like tattoo on his shoulder. He held Gu Yanshu’s finger and let it to the tattoo. “Do you still remember this? What is hidden below are your teeth marks. I wonder how your teeth grew to be so strong? You bit so deeply that there’s a scar.”

    Gu Yanshu rubbed the tattoo gently with his fingertips, his eyes blank and innocent.

    Shen Jue explained in a low voice, “When I arrived that day, you were drunk, and you hugged me while crying all night. You even bit me. But later, you said you hated me and wanted to kick me out, so I left. You can’t deny that this happened.”

    Drip!

    A tear fell on it.

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    Gu Yanshu lowered his head and took the tear into his mouth. Then, he covered the tattoo with his teeth and closed his eyes, as if he was recalling the scene at that time.

    Shen Jue took a deep breath and didn’t dodge. “Bite me if you want to. It’s my fault. I should have come to you earlier. But Gu Yanshu, I really didn’t abandon you. I just thought you didn’t like me.”

    After a pause, he said in a slightly hoarse voice, “Besides, you were the one who said we shouldn’t meet first. You were the one who said you didn’t like me. How can you say that I don’t want you anymore?”

    The following parts of the text will be scrambled to prevent theft from aggregators and unauthorized epub making. Please support our translators by reading on secondlifetranslations (dot) com. If you are currently on the site and and you are seeing this, please clear your cache.

    Rd qynv, Fbld Kwl bye vbswtbv ycswv vbkp iwlpvksd xydu vkxlp.&dcpr;

    Ebu bye bl clld okzzkdt vs zlyhl Qw Zydpbw?

    Tl vbswtbv vbyv kv nswze cl clnywpl sq vbl vbalyv vbyv bkp qyvbla, Fbld Kk, xyel. Rq bl eked’v ts bsxl yde eked’v nsxrasxkpl, Qw Zydpbw oswzed’v cl yczl vs vlaxkdyvl vbl nsdvaynv sd tsse vlaxp, yde bl oswzed’v byhl clld yczl vs plde bkp xsvbla qsa vbl srlayvksd.

    Xa rlabyrp kv oyp clnywpl obld bkp qyvbla vssj bkx vs vbl bsprkvyz, bl blyae Qw Zydpbw’p xsvbla pyu, “Dkys Fbw, Ysx bsrlp vbyv usw nyd tlv xyaakle yde byhl nbkzeald, yde sod vbl xspv saekdyau byrrkdlpp.”&dcpr;

    Gv vbyv vkxl, Qw Zydpbw bye pyke, “Psd’v osaau, Ysx. R esd’v zkjl Fbld Kwl. Psd’v osaau. Qlv clvvla pssd.”

    Fs, yv vbyv vkxl, bl osdelale kq bl nswze lhla tkhl Qw Zydpbw y tsse zkql.

    Mbkp osaze oyp alyzkpvkn. Mblu bye vs elyz okvb vbl plmwyz sakldvyvksd sq vbkp xkdsakvu taswr sq rlsrzl, vbl kdyckzkvu sq vblka qyxkzklp vs wdelapvyde vblx, bwtl elcvp, lmrldpkhl xleknyz lmrldplp, yde vbl zkqlzsdt ealyxp sq vlldytlap.

    Tl nswze zkhl y cye zkql, cwv bkp Qw Zydpbw nswzed’v.

    The young man who always practised the hardest should get his stage. The young man who took down every page of notes seriously should return to school. The beautiful and kind young man should also have a good girl who loved him.

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    All of this was what he wanted to give Gu Yanshu five years ago.

    He felt that liking someone, and loving someone, should also encompass some form of giving, and to fulfil that person’s lifelong peace and joy.

    If Gu Yanshu didn’t like him, then he would give up on Gu Yanshu too.

    However, he didn’t expect his five years of withdrawal to be wasted because of a single meeting.

    On the night of the funeral of Gu Yanshu’s mother, Gu Yanshu hugged him and cried in despair and grief. It was similar to the way he was acting now. He said that he didn’t want him anymore, and even cried hysterically, looking extremely aggrieved. When he bit his shoulder, it seemed as though his hatred was bone-deep.

    After Shen Jue got home, he didn’t sleep well for almost a month. He was wondering why Gu Yanshu had acted that way. He was wondering if Gu Yanshu missed him as much as he missed Gu Yanshu.

    Hence, he sped up the process of getting his shares back and also sped up the accumulation of bargaining chips that he could use to go against Shen Ji. That way, when Gu Yanshu called again after getting drunk, he wouldn’t have to care about anything else.

    He really didn’t care about anything. He just wanted to see if Gu Yanshu liked him.

    It was just like the small line of English words under the poppy tattoo.

    I can’t quit you.

    He couldn’t quit Gu Yanshu.

    Even if they hadn’t seen each other for a long time, even if they were strangers, he would be addicted to the other man again, as long as Gu Yanshu looked at him.

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    Shen Jue hugged Gu Yanshu and said in a deep and hoarse voice, “Gu Yanshu, I’ve never abandoned you. I’m just waiting for you to say that you like me. Do you understand?” 

    The arrogant, despotic, and profligate traits in his bones were all gone, leaving only a patient and gentle explanation.

    He didn’t know if Gu Yanshu understood him, for the latter simply buried himself in his arms and held his collar tightly. Then, he choked and said, “Brother, don’t abandon me.”

    Shen Jue’s heart ached at his words. He kissed the top of Gu Yanshu’s head. “Alright. “I won’t abandon you. I like you so much. How can I not want you?”

    Gu Yanshu tightened his grip around his neck. “Then hug me and kiss me, okay?”

    Shen Jue chuckled. “I’m afraid that if I kiss you, you’ll get angry again…”

    He didn’t finish speaking.

    He simply froze. 

    Gu Yanshu had touched his lips gently.


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    dazedcherry [Translator]

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