Chapter 63

As he walked up to the school gate, the security guard asked him which class he belonged to, as was the policy since being tardy would usually result in a write-up. 

Lin Xigu explained that he was returning to school for his physical examination and that he was a resident student at another school. The security guard took the time to verify his information before letting him in.

Lin Xigu crossed the gate with a single step. It was the same gate that he and She Xiao had passed through on countless mornings before.

He bypassed the front building, crossed the track field, and by the time he reached the steps leading up to the front doors of the North Building, his breathing had quickened with anticipation. 

He had already asked Li Balei in the car whether She Xiao was at school that day.

Li Balei had texted:

He’s heeere!

Lin Xigu’s hands were sweating in his pockets.

The following parts of the text will be scrambled to prevent theft from aggregators and unauthorized epub making. Please support our translators by reading on secondlifetranslations (dot) com. If you are currently on the site and and you are seeing this, please clear your cache.

Tl vwadle qasx vbl pvykaolzz sdvs vbl qzssa oblal vblka nzyppassx oyp. Mbl pswdep sq ekqqlaldv zlnvwalp nswze cl blyae kdvlaxkdtzkdt kd vbl byzzoyu. Tkp nzypp bye Ubkdlpl Nkv vbyv rlakse, yde vblka vlynbla’p wdkiwlzu burdsvkn hsknl oyp easdkdt sd kd vbl cynjtaswde.

Nkd Dktw ewnjle vbaswtb vbl cynj essa.

Mbl qlo pvweldvp obs dsvknle bkx qkapv tallvle bkx iwklvzu, cwv qasx vbl vkxl bl pvlrrle vbaswtb vbl essa, Nkd Dktw dlhla vssj bkp lulp sqq sq Fbl Dkys.

Fbl Dkys oyp zssjkdt swv vbl okdeso. Wasx Nkd Dktw’p ydtzl, bl nswze sdzu pll y pzkhla sq Fbl Dkys’p qynl.

Rv oyp ldswtb.

Nk Jyzlk blyae vbl nsxxsvksd yde vwadle. Fbl dlyazu zlyrv swv sq bla nbyka obld pbl pyo Nkd Dktw. Nkd Dktw xyel y pbwpbkdt xsvksd yv bla.

Nk Jyzlk iwknjzu pvkqzle bla ulzr.

Fbl Dkys oyp zspv kd bkp sod osaze, kdekqqlaldv vs obyvlhla lzpl oyp byrrldkdt kd vbl assx. Nkd Dktw bye saktkdyzzu ewnjle esod vs pdlyj kd wddsvknle, cwv vbl vlynbla bye yzalyeu prsvvle bkx, ps Nkd Dktw pvayktbvldle wr yde dseele yv vbl vlynbla.

Then he took a deep breath, walked to his seat, and plopped down in it.

She Xiao turned with a scowl, his face full of impatience and annoyance at having his thoughts interrupted. But the moment he saw Lin Xigu, he froze.

Lin Xigu smiled at him, tilting his head slightly.

Surprise and confusion settled into She Xiao’s face, much like he had looked on countless occasions when he had been woken up from a nap. Lin Xigu felt his heart swell with a feeling that spread all the way to his eyes until his eyes were burning.

His chest had felt tight since he first came through the door and saw She Xiao sitting alone, staring out the window.

She Xiao looked very thin, and very withdrawn.

“Hey, you. Good morning,” Lin Xigu said quietly.

She Xiao’s eyebrows were already travelling higher on his forehead as he stared at Lin Xigu wordlessly.

“Why’s my desk so tidy?” Lin Xigu asked. “Where are all my handouts?”

She Xiao seemed to recover a little from the shock. “You came back… for the physical?” 

“That’s right,” Lin Xigu smiled, nodding. He looked around to check that no one other than Li Balei and Fang Xiaoshan were listening in before asking She Xiao quietly, “Surprised?”

She Xiao finally seemed to return fully to his senses. His eyes softened gradually as his brows and the corners of his mouth eased into an expression of joy.

Lin Xigu had deliberately worn She Xiao’s school uniform that day. The sleeves were a little long. Lin Xigu shrugged the sleeves back, revealing the note clutched in his hand, and stuffed it into She Xiao’s palm under the desk.

As their hands parted, She Xiao squeezed his finger gently.

Lin Xigu’s eyelashes trembled, his heart pounding.

She Xiao brought his hands to the top of his desk and smoothed open the note. The note had been dampened by Lin Xigu’s sweaty hands so the lettering was slightly blurred. On the note were the two sentences Lin Xigu had written in the car.

— Now that I’ve seen you, I’ll have the strength to continue on for many days to come. I’m rooting for you.

Lin Xigu had been unable to stay calm on the car ride, so he had written the note on a random scrap of paper.

He was rooting for She Xiao, and he was also rooting for himself.

“Lin Xigu, can you please look at me now?! I’ve been staring at you for ages!” Li Balei couldn’t take it anymore. Why were those two stuck on each other like magnets from the moment they saw each other? She and Fang Xiaoshan were about to have sore necks if he couldn’t make time for them.

Lin Xigu finally ripped his eyes away from She Xiao long enough to say to Li Balei, “Ballet Grrrl, the teacher’s glaring at you. Why don’t we catch up after class?”

Li Balei glanced at their Chinese Lit teacher and their eyes happened to meet. She glowered at Lin Xigu and mumbled, “Can’t believe you’re putting testes over besties… just you wait!”

After she turned to face the front, Lin Xigu laid his head down on the desk so he could give She Xiao his full attention. It seemed like forever ago that he had been able to look at him so closely from this angle. For Lin Xigu, this was a rare opportunity.

They couldn’t be too overt about their actions in class. Lin Xigu could lie on his desk and stare at She Xiao, but She Xiao could not look back the same way. When class was finally over, Lin Xigu wanted to pull She Xiao away and lead him to a secluded corner of the school or even a bathroom cubicle – anywhere where he could give him a hug and share a private conversation.

But he wasn’t able to get away in the end as he found himself surrounded by people waiting to greet him. Lin Xigu had always gotten along with everyone in the class, which meant that he couldn’t find an opportunity to escape with She Xiao for the whole break.

As the bell rang in the next period, everyone returned to their seats, leaving only Li Balei chattering away. Li Balei had been the one relaying his messages and looking out for She Xiao this entire time, plus they were already close friends to begin with, so Lin Xigu was glad for any chance to talk to her.

But it did not lessen his impatience to spend time with She Xiao in private.

Their physics teacher walked in and Li Balei reluctantly turned to face the front. Lin Xigu looked at She Xiao and grimaced.

She Xiao’s eyes were gentle as he gave Lin Xigu a small smile.

Lin Xigu scratched his ear. It was beyond frustrating to be sitting so close to the person you wanted to see most in the world but not be able to touch them!

“Our lesson will be cut short today for your physical exam. What a waste of my time. I tried to bargain with your homeroom teacher but he wouldn’t budge an inch. He gets to commandeer your time with endless study halls and he won’t even give me twenty minutes. What a tightwad.”

Their physics teacher boomed at them for a few minutes as he griped about the physical spoiling a good lecture.

Lin Xigu blocked him out as he stared at She Xiao, grinning.

She Xiao had a small cut on his hand. Lin Xigu pointed to it, asking quietly, “What happened?”

She Xiao glanced at it and said indifferently, “Wasn’t paying attention.”

Lin Xigu found a bandage in She Xiao’s backpack and applied it to his hand.

“What are you two doing in the back?” A single comment from the physics teacher drew the curious stares of the entire class. “Hey, isn’t that Lin Xigu? I’m very glad to have you back with us but that doesn’t mean you can distract my top student from paying attention. Agreed?”

Lin Xigu smiled and nodded. “Got it, Teach! I’ll be good!”

Their physics teacher was a decent person and Lin Xigu quite liked him. He didn’t dare speak to She Xiao again for the rest of class and could only watch the clock ticking one second at a time, fidgeting with his pants and occasionally exchanging glances with She Xiao.

At 9:55, Zhou Cheng knocked on the classroom door. “C’mon, kids, let’s blow this crappy physics stand. Come out and line up, we’re walking to the school clinic. Remember to stay in line and stand together with your class. If you step out of the line, your results will end up filed with a different class, you hear?”

The physics teacher threw a few more comebacks at Zhou Cheng but Lin Xigu did not hear the rest of what was said as he stood and grabbed She Xiao’s wrist, pulling him to the back of the line.

“I have to leave later today…” Lin Xigu told She Xiao quietly.

She Xiao looked at him. “Mn.”

Lin Xigu didn’t know what else to say. She Xiao had not reacted at all to this information. Lin Xigu turned his head to watch the rest of the class organize themselves into a proper line until he felt a light tug on his earlobe.

Lin Xigu looked up at She Xiao. She Xiao bent his head slightly and said softly, “I’m skipping class… this afternoon.”

Lost in the crowd, no one was looking at them. Or perhaps a few were, but She Xiao did not seem to care whatsoever. Lin Xigu’s heart was blooming at the secret intimacy they shared in broad daylight.

He nodded fiercely.

The physical examinations were proceeding by class number. Zhou Cheng handed Lin Xigu the necessary forms and chatted with him for a while, asking how his new school was treating him and whether he was able to keep up in class.

Zhou Cheng had always been kind to him in his two years at this school. Lin Xigu felt comforted at the sight of him.

Lin Xigu was the second-to-last student in their class to complete his checkup. She Xiao brought up the rear. In sequential order, Lin Xigu moved from the weigh-in to his vitals to the vision test. The last station was the blood test.

He took off his jacket and calmly extended his arm for the nurse. She Xiao followed closely behind him. After Lin Xigu was done, he thanked the nurse, then stood off to the side to wait for She Xiao.

She Xiao took a seat and looked up at Lin Xigu. “I’m… a little thirsty.”

Lin Xigu smiled. “Let’s go buy water once you’re done.”

“Can you go?” She Xiao said.

Lin Xigu blinked. The request seemed a little strange but he almost never refused She Xiao. He nodded. “Then meet me back in the classroom after you finish.”

She Xiao agreed, “Okay.”

Lin Xigu turned and left. She Xiao waited until Lin Xigu was out of sight completely before rolling up his sleeve to let the nurse take a blood sample.

The nurse looked visibly shocked when she saw his arm.

She Xiao’s entire forearm was wrapped in a thick layer of gauze.

“What happened to your arm?” The nurse asked.

“Nothing,” She Xiao said nonchalantly. “Go on.”

The nurse tugged his sleeve up a little more to access the vein near the bend of his elbow. With She Xiao’s arm so tightly bandaged, there was nowhere for her to place her hand to hold his arm in place. Frowning, she asked, “What about your other arm?”

“Same,” She Xiao said.

The nurse looked up at him, deliberating.

“Hurry,” She Xiao urged.

The next few in line were girls from another class. Their eyes roved over She Xiao’s arm as they whispered to each other in hushed tones.

The nurse finally asked She Xiao to prop his arm on a cushion. The needle slid in but she was unable to draw any blood. She tried three times without success.

“Let’s try your other arm. Your veins are in a bad state; they’re almost collapsed. Are you anemic by any chance?”

“No,” She Xiao quickly tugged his sleeve over the rejected arm and showed her his other arm, urging her again, “Hurry.”

“I want to be quick too, but what else can I do if I can’t draw any blood?” The nurse was getting frustrated as well. She was very young, and was likely still doing her residency. If she couldn’t draw blood this time, they were going to sub in someone else and that would be embarrassing.

She Xiao did not say anything else, watching coolly as the nurse felt around his arm for the presence of an unscarred vein.

Then, he heard Lin Xigu’s voice from behind him, “I thought you might still be here. I ran into Xiaoshan at the door. He just happened to have bought…”

She Xiao shrank back reflexively and the nurse caught his arm, frowning. “I finally got the needle in place, why are you moving around?”

Lin Xigu stared down at She Xiao’s heavily bandaged arm. Standing beside him, he couldn’t get the rest of his words out.

She Xiao lifted his head and looked at him. He saw how Lin Xigu’s eyes reddened in an instant. His wide eyes were always bright; it was heart-wrenching every time he saw them cloud over.

She Xiao sighed and sat wordlessly as the nurse finished drawing her sample, then carelessly swabbed his arm with a cotton ball before tugging his sleeve down over it.

He took Lin Xigu’s arm and led him down the hall, into a dusty corner where no one could see them.

She Xiao stopped there, his hand sliding down Lin Xigu’s arm and weaved their fingers together. He leaned in and kissed Lin Xigu’s eyes, then said quietly in his ear, “You look better… with light in your eyes.”